Couples Therapy in DC, VA & TN

  • Do you wish your partner would understand you?

  • Are you tired of having the same arguments over and over again and things just don’t seem to be getting better in your relationship?

  • Are you both wanting to work on things, but haven’t figured out how?

 

You tell yourself, I love this person, but I’m tired of feeling alone in my relationship. I just want us back. You and/or your partner are so busy with the everyday grind of work, kids, overall life, that you don’t seem to have time for each other anymore and you realized you’ve grown apart.

You’d do anything for this person, and feel shame that you’ve said or done something hurtful and you want to fix it. Maybe you’re on the receiving end of this and are angry, resentful, and want the person to realize how much pain they’ve caused. This sometimes shows up in arguments over dishes, the garbage, parenting, and/or finances.

You want to strengthen your relationship. Maybe you feel like things are going pretty well and prepping to move in together or getting married. Maybe you’re hoping to expand your family to get a pet, or have children and want counseling to set yourselves up for success.

You want love & respect in your relationship. You want to be a team.

We can’t change what we don’t know, so let’s fix that.

Together we will…

  • Identify what the conflict is and how each partner responds to it.

  • Explore what emotions are surfacing for both parties…the good, the bad and the ugly.

    • I know I know…some of you may be reading this and be thinking emotions?! NO THANKS. Well my friend, this might be part of the problem and I want to help you find the solution. Let’s work to fix this. It may require a little discomfort and yep….feelings. I will help guide you in hopes you see the strength it takes to expose emotions. Did you know a common character trait of some of the best leaders is showing some level of vulnerability?! This skill not only helps you, your own relationship, but also you’ll find a better ability to work with others as a whole. A win-win!

  • Build off of the awareness to manage the emotions in order to build effective communication

  • Identify cycles your relation may experience and learn how to stop it

  • Learn how to navigate through disagreements or problems with love and respect

You don’t have to keep spinning in circles, hoping it will change this time.

A path through this is possible.

FAQs

 

It seems like there’ been a build up of stuff between us, how do we even start?

First just know, it’s OK to be unsure. It can feel a little overwhelming if you’re new to couples counseling, or even just new to me! I’m going to listen to each of you, understanding that you both will have different perspectives on what’s going on. If you need some help getting started, I can assist by asking questions to help you feel more at ease.

Will you take sides?

No. I’m here for the relationship as a whole. I will be supportive and caring to each party, while also challenging each of you. There may be times when defenses are high and it can feel like I’m siding with your partner. If you feel this at any time, I want to hear about it in the moment. Not only is this important to me to be a neutral party, but it’s also a teachable moment to identify how you’re feeling, but also to assertively address the issue. If you ever have questions about the process or experience in the session, please ask!

I’m afraid if we talk about things, it will get worse…will this happen?

I understand why you might be worried about this. I want you to know that sometimes it can feel uncomfortable because hey, change is hard. Ask yourself this…if things stayed comfortable and nothing didn’t change…would things get better? No! If that was true, you wouldn’t be reading this, hoping for help or change.

I will offer change strategies and it can feel uncomfortable at times. Please know this is typically a sign of progress! The more we do something out of our comfort zone, the more comfortable it gets. For instance, if a client is used to making snyde remarks when they get upset, it may feel uncomfortable as they work to implement the skills learned in therapy. The ultimate goal is progress for your relationship, whatever that means to you.

How long will therapy take?

The short answer is, it depends. You can expect therapy to be like an onion. There are layers, it’s potent and sometimes makes you tear up, but in the end it’s worth it because it adds life to our plate. We will develop a specific plan for you and your needs. I’m always here to answer questions along the way.